Your Core Values Called; They Want Their Power Back
The sneaky reason you keep feeling unfulfilled (and how to fix it)
You can meditate till your chakras glow, journal till your wrist cramps, or pay $300 for a crystal blessed by some guru named Skylar. But if you’re skipping over Core Values, you’re just rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, my friend.
Core Values aren’t just a cute Pinterest board exercise. They’re the foundation. The bedrock. The North Star that keeps all the other roots of wellness from getting lost in the chaos of life. Without them, you can work on habits, self-talk, and relationship to self till the cows come home—and those things are powerful, don’t get me wrong. But without Core Values to anchor them, it’s like building a house on quicksand. You’re just spinning your wheels without traction.
Science backs this up, too. Research shows that fulfilling core values like self-direction can significantly impact well-being. According to the Journal of Positive Psychology, people who live in alignment with their values report higher life satisfaction, less stress, and a stronger sense of purpose. And it doesn’t stop there—self-affirmation practices that focus on core values have been proven to boost happiness, optimism, and overall psychological well-being. Why? Because when your actions and values are in sync, you’re not wasting energy second-guessing every move. You know what’s right for you.
Think about it: How many times have you set a goal because you thought you should—lose weight, get a promotion, ‘be more productive’—only to feel like crap once you get it? That’s the feeling of being out of alignment. When your goals don’t sync with your values, you’re just collecting ‘achievements’ that don’t mean squat.
And here’s the kicker—most people have no idea what their core values actually are. They’re chasing goals that look good on paper but feel empty as hell. Studies even show that people who pursue goals that align with their true values, known as autonomous goals, are more likely to hit those targets and feel fulfilled when they do. Meanwhile, those chasing surface-level achievements are more likely to feel burned out, anxious, and totally unfulfilled. They think they do. They rattle off words like ‘family’ or ‘success,’ but when we start digging, they realize they’re living someone else’s script. That’s why at Twisted Willow, we strip it all down. We ask the messy questions. We poke the bear. We get you to look at what really lights you up and what you’ve been pretending to care about.
Take Elaine, for example. She came to us feeling like a fraud despite having all the external signs of success—a high-paying job, a big house, the ‘perfect’ life. But she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing. After working through her core values, she realized she was living according to what her family and her industry expected, not what she actually wanted. Once she realigned with her true values—authenticity, creativity, and connection—she finally felt at home in her own life(with some tweaks). That’s the power of knowing your core values—it’s like putting on glasses after stumbling around in the dark. Everything clicks.
So before you dive into building habits or working on your self-talk (we hit those later), get to the root. Schwartz’s Value Theory makes it crystal clear—values that emphasize personal growth and self-fulfillment are directly linked to greater life satisfaction, while values focused on external validation and self-protection actually correlate with more stress and dissatisfaction. Translation? If you’re grinding toward goals that don’t align with your values, you’re signing up for frustration on a silver platter. Core values aren’t just another to-do list item. They’re the compass. The filter. The whole damn map. And when you know them, every other decision gets easier. You stop chasing shiny objects and start building a life that’s yours, not someone else’s.
Until next time, take a hot second to jot down three things you stand for, no matter what. And if you’re unsure? That’s your first clue that it’s time to dig deeper.
You in?
xoxo
Lauren & Corinne
